Love Is Not What You Think!
The mind knows nothing about Love. All information the mind receives regarding love is false. What the mind knows has been taught by our culture, words read and thoughts shared by other minds. And to make things worse… what our mind knows about love is wrong information. Love in its truest sense is not what you experience in the mind, it is not an action, and it does not have to be learned and practiced. Love is beyond the mind and your thoughts. It is your essence.
From the beginning of time, humans have experienced feelings that the mind has struggled to define. These feelings are derived from physical sensations experienced by being in a body with a highly sensitive nervous system. In addition, the mind produces thoughts about what it knows and offers its best interpretation of that information and perceptual experiences that it has recorded and stored in its memory cells.
All bodies have biological needs that center-around physical survival and procreation. Science and research will tell us that we are a coupling and relationship-oriented species. To procreate we must have an opposite gender partner or at least their egg or sperm to accomplish this. We have chemical attractors that come into play in attracting a mate. Most mothers have an innate drive to raise their young to survive when they grow up. And fathers can either, stay around and participate in the family, or not. In many cases the maternal drive is automatic and programmed into the biological organism. This is all at least true until the mind comes into the picture.
The mind, on the other hand, sees the body as separate and as a result creates needs and desires that mimic the culture and society’s values and morals. The mind stores all experiences and these memories can be seen as positive, negative, traumatic and or complex. The mind with all of what it has learned attaches to people and things in order to feel safe, experience pleasure and avoid suffering. The mind believes it must possess and control. It is never satisfied and wants more of what is pleasurable and less of what it sees as painful.
The mind craves a feeling of connectedness. The mind of one person will form a relationship with another mind and body not only to fulfil the need for survival and procreation but for additional “psychological” or emotional reasons. Reasons engulf areas such as companionship, economic fulfilment, status, convenience and sexual pleasure. I am not judging these areas as bad as this is the way most human minds operate and it helps the separate body to feel pleasure and avoid suffering.
So how did the word “love” get so popular? This word has been used by cultures all over the world, coupled with strongly held cultural values and teachings, to connote a description of something “magical” that happens to all of us in regard to personal relationships. Overall, this word is meant to help us to understand a common experience of why we are coupled, how we feel about our mate, our children or our friends. However, what has happened through the centuries is that the word love has become a generic way to describe a plethora of physical and emotional sensations and perceptions. We use the word love to show appreciation for getting what we want, to attract a mate, to explain why we stay in a relationship and as an opposite to the word hate.
I believe that love is a word that is extremely overused and completely misunderstood. The word love is attached to anything that makes the mind feel pleasure.
Now the truth of the matter is that Love with a capital “L” is not any of these mind things I have described. Love that comes from the mind is most often about attachment, seeking of personal pleasure, wanting to feel safe secure and cared for, a rationale for remaining in a relationship, and a sense of duty and or responsibility to our children, friends and blood relatives.
The truth about Love is that it is actually a state of Being not a state of mind. It is who we are in every present moment. When we transcend the small self, Love comes into the light. We recognize that we are Love beyond the mind and body and being that Love we are one with everything. We see the Love shining all around us in this state of Being. At that present moment all is as it should be!
Having that state of Being, even for a fleeting moment, changes your everyday mind and body bound life. The mind learns that all is Love and then the mind will offer you higher level thoughts. This recognition will change the way you view life and the mind will naturally display more loving-kindness and compassion.
How can I recognize this Love that I am? No amount of mind exercise or formulas will bring you to this state of Being. However, the recognition that you are not the mind and body will begin to plant the seeds that can yield the fruit. This recognition is gained by watching your mind and its musings. Thoughts must be negated including the mind’s thoughts about your separateness.
Like an apple that falls from the tree when it is ripe, Love will dawn upon you when you are ready to transcend the mind created illusion we call life.
I welcome your comments and dialogue on this subject so feel free to post a response or inquire about the information offered. Blessings & Love
Also published on Medium.